Can It Be Both?

This evening I posted a tweet that said “Friendship can either be a two way street or a dead end. You decide.” And I meant something very specific when I said this. Either friendship is a two way street with mutual appreciation, respect, communication, love, and everything else we think of with strong friendships or it is a dead end friendship which has no future and the only thing to do is cut it off and turn around.

Now when I posted this tweet I was thinking of friendship in a very black and white type of way. Like, it can be this or that and nothing else. But then a friend replied to my tweet and simply said “it can be both…” And as simple as those words were, they opened up new ideas in my head and sent my thoughts into a spiral.

And I realized, yes, friendships really can be both a two way street and a dead end. I really sat down and thought about how that would work and I’m not sure if this is what he meant, but this is what I got from that.

OK so look. I’m going to break it down.

Some two way streets seem to go on forever and those symbolize those strong friendships that last for a lifetime.

Then there are some streets that you can clearly tell from the beginning are dead ends and those are those friendships that end as quickly as they started. It just wasn’t meant to last from the start.

But there are also some streets that seem like they will last forever, but eventually end in a dead end. This can be representative of friendships that are productive for a while but eventually reach a dead end. Those friends who helped you grow and learn for a season in life but were not meant to last a lifetime. During that season of life it seems like the friendship will never end, but eventually you start to see the signs. The ones that say “Dead End Ahead”. And you start to realize it won’t last forever and you both slow down until you come to a complete stop. And that is the end.

Now with those type of friendships you have a few choices. You can ignore the sign and keep trying to move forward, at your own risk. You can stay at that dead end and lament, cry, wallow, and feel sorry about the lost friendship. Or you can appreciate the friendship for what it was, realize not everything is meant to last, turn around and seek new paths.

I would hope you choose to let go, turn around, and seek new paths. Because continuing down a dead end road can be dangerous. You put yourself in harms way when you ignore the sign and you may find yourself in situations you were never meant to be in.

If I’m being honest, I struggle to let go of friendships even when they reach the clear “dead end” point. When I reach a dead end in a friendship it hits me hard and I want to do anything I can to fix it. But from past experience I have seen how holding on to a dead friendship can be detrimental. It was very damaging to me as I tried to salvage something while the other person had moved on.

But if you need to sit at the dead end for a moment while you gather yourself, it’s ok. Eventually though, you will need to turn around and seek new paths.

Even with those dead end friendships, it is important to appreciate them for what they were. Appreciate the good times you had, the moments you shared, and the lessons you learned. Those friendships were beneficial to your journey even though you may not be able to see that for a while.

As they say: some people stick around forever, but some are only meant for a season in your life. And that is ok.

 

Fun Facts Tag

I feel like I haven’t blogged in such a long time, and truthfully I haven’t. Lately I’ve been so busy trying to juggle school, work, and all my other responsibilties, so I’ve had to take a short break from blogging. It’s been hard, but also very necessary because I need to make sure my priorities are in proper order. That being said, I decided to take a break from studying to write a short post. Since I have been nominated by The Sunny C (she’s awesome, go check out her blog) to do a “10 fun facts about me” tag, I figured it was something I would be able to accomplish in a fairly short amount of time.

So, here goes!

  1. I am a Christian, born & raised SDA and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
  2. I spent the first few years of my life in Kenya
  3. I LOVE the color red, I always look for a way to get anything and everything in red
  4. I could eat rice and beans everyday and not get tired of it
  5. I’m a junior in college
  6. Since starting college I have never worn sweatpants to class, I wear them everywhere else, but never to class
  7. I play 3 instruments and I sing
  8. I always have gum with me. at all times. always.
  9. My favorite cake is carrot cake (without raisins)
  10. I absolutely LOVE reading, in fact I just stumbled upon an awesome sale today in the English Dept. on my campus–$5 for a box of books. So I filled that box up to the top & got over 20 awesome books for $5! 🙂

So there you have it, 10 facts about me. Obviously those 10 facts don’t fully explain who I am as a person, but at least they give you more of an idea of who this Hannah girl is.

Now I nominate: Being in 2000 Something I The Girl in Glasses I The Champa Tree

Thanks for taking the time to read about me, feel free to ask any questions if you want to know more about me.

And now I will retreat back to my desk to continue on with my studies.

Sisterhood Of The World Bloggers Award

sisterhood-of-the-world-bloggers-award11

When I first started this blog I didn’t know what to expect, I just wanted a place to get my thoughts out. I have to admit that I didn’t even know that blogging awards even existed, until I was nominated for one. I’m still fairly new to this blogging experience, I’ve had this blog for less than a year, but I’m so happy that my posts have made enough of an impact on someone that they would nominate me for this. I love everything about blogging and I especially love the people I’ve gotten to interact with on here. I want to thank Dark Roast for nominating me, if you haven’t already checked out her blog you definitely should!

So, these are the rules for this award that I have received:

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site
  • Put the Award logo on your blog
  • Answer the ten questions sent to you
  • Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer
  • Nominate seven blogs

Q&A:

1. What’s one piece of advice you’d give your fellow bloggers?

Follow your heart, if you begin to write a post and you are lead in a certain direction, go with it. At the end you will look back at what you have written and for the most part you will love the outcome.

2. What do you consider to be the most important thing to you in life and are you giving enough time to it?

The most important thing in my life is my relationship with Christ, and I am not giving it enough time. I know that I need to give him more time and I’m really working on that.

3. Where do you see yourself 5 years from now? 10 years?

5 years from now I see myself in Grad School for Public Health with a Dietetics emphasis, also hopefully in a committed relationship. 10 years from now I see myself working to help people live healthy lifestyles through diet and exercise, I also see myself married.

4. If you could tell your younger self one thing, what would it be?

Don’t be so afraid, even if you get rejected or fail it’s not the end of the world.

5. When was the last time you laughed until you cried?

I honestly can’t remember, but I think it was in the last couple months

6. Who is your favorite fictional character?

The minions from Despicable Me…does that count?

7. Mean Girls or Heathers?

I’ve never seen Heathers, so I guess I’ll have to go with Mean Girls

8. What are your 3 favorite songs at the moment?

Masterpiece by Jessie J

Footprints In The Sand by Leona Lewis

Dreaming of a City by Sweet Symphony

9. What makes you get out of bed every day?

My 6:30 AM appointment with the gym and my goal to reach my ideal weight

10. What do you miss most about your childhood?

Being free to have fun and play with all day long and not having so many responsibilities to worry about

My 7 Nominees are:

The Sunny C

Finding My Inner Zen

Silver Lining Mama

So Basically… 

J. Nicole Morgan

In Pursuit of Contentment 

Megan Elizabeth

10 Questions to answer:

  1. If you could do one thing over, what would it be?
  2. Out of all your blog posts, which one is your favorite? Why?
  3. Why did you decide to start blogging?
  4. What advice do you have for new bloggers as they deal with criticism from commenters?
  5. Do you plan to maintain your blog over the years or is it just temporary?
  6. What is the most important lesson you have learned while blogging?
  7. What is your favorite childhood memory?
  8. What do you like to do with your free time?
  9. Is there any topic you consider to be completely inappropriate for any blogger to address?
  10. Who or what do you love the most in your life?

Happy Blogging! 🙂

Expiration Dates on Friendships

I have trust issues.

I used to believe that friends lasted forever.

But then I realized that most friendships have an expiration date.

It’s hard for me to trust people because in the back of my mind I’m always waiting for them to get tired of me and leave.

I have lost a lot of friends because they have chosen to walk out of my life.

Therefore, though I don’t know exactly when the expiration date is, I feel like some friendships are like a ticking time bomb.

I will admit, because of being let down time and time again, I have a hard time putting my guard down and letting people in all the way.

Trust is a risk.

 But…

 I have some friends who restore my faith in friendships.

I have some friends who have never walked out on me.

I have some friends who have stuck by me through the good and the bad.

I have some friends who make me realize that some friendships stay fresh forever, no expiration date included.

I have some friends who kick down my walls and force themselves in because they have no intentions of ever leaving.

I have some friends who make me forget all the bad and focus my attention on the good.

 Those are the kinds of friends I am selfish about, I know a good thing when I see it and there are some friendships I will fight for, no matter what it takes.

 Life is not about looking at the hard times, it’s about celebrating the good times.

In the end I have learned to keep my circle small.

My small circle, that I’m so selfish about, is the family that I have chosen. And I love them.